Football

Pie 23: The Motherwell Pie

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The discerning choice for young women who like fitba'.
The discerning choice for young women who like fitba’.

The next entry on Meat Filled Pastries is brought to you by the Scottish National Women’s Football team and their home for the Canada 2015 World Cup qualifiers, Fir Park, Motherwell. Now usually this paragraph is reserved for some absolute nonsense about the week that has just passed but this time I’m going for a slight change of pace.

Recently one of my closest friends passed away after a 2 year battle with bowel cancer and all the complications ensued, aged just 28. Throughout it all he refused to let it stop things he wanted to do and see the things he wanted to see. To pass many a bored hour in hospital or at home he busied himself with a number of internet projects. One of which is ‘The Grambler’, a bookie busting algorithm of randomnosity, that experiences varying levels of success, with any winnings that it procured going to The Bobby Moore Fund for Bowel Cancer Awareness. The links are located on the right hand side of this page and I’ll put the full addresses at the end of this latest entry into the Pie Hall of Fame. Please take the time to have a look at these sites and if you like this, Leading the Line or The Grambler itself feel free to make a donation or have a flutter.

With all that being said let’s get into the business of talking about pies. My mate was a massive Motherwell fan, and so when it became apparent that things were not to go his way I made it an aim to get to Fir Park as quickly as possible as some kind of weird meat filled pastry tribute.

So without much further ado Lets Rate Some Pie!

Where: Fir Park (Home of Motherwell FC) Scotland Women v Bosnia and Herzegovina Women, World Cup Qualifying Group 4

Price: Priced at £2.00, while still expensive for a meat filled pastry when placed in comparison with both the Hampden and Rangers pie it actually comes in at 20p cheaper than these similarly levelled competitors.

Presentation: Came in a silver tin foil case, with a ‘help yourself to napkins’ policy, they were of adequate size so only one was required. Not really much to report here.

Meatiness: As always a scotch pie, this effort was something of a deep-filled beauty. What immediately struck me on first bite was that this was not the same generic fare I had experienced at grounds of similar stature previously. This is not to say the previous pies were not good, more an indication of the pleasant surprise that engulfed me on the realisation of this very point. The meat inside was really savoury and although that smack of pepper I usually like in my pie was not present the flavour of the mutton inside meant I did not miss it at all. The meat also held incredibly well and was soft to the bite.

Pastry: A nice even bake on the top of the pastry meant the all important crust was present with enough bite to provide texture but soft enough not to leave you wishing you had the denture work of a 1970’s Bond villain. Unfortunately, as does happen from time to time when a tin foil case is used to hold these meaty delicacies, the pastry at the bottom of the pie was ever so slightly soggy meaning there was some minor spillage when picking it up to take a bite. However that being said, this was a minor inconvenience in an otherwise delicious pie.

Overall: A very good effort, the meat was tasty and the pastry ratio was spot on combining to give this pie an ‘original’ taste, not like a Werther’s, but a taste that after enough time could be distinguishable as a ‘Motherwell Pie’, something that I feel is lost at the top end of the modern game. As a side note the Brown Sauce on offer was not provided by HP but by another company whose name is long forgotten but proved itself a dark, tangy and tasty alternative.

Gravy Factor: The ladies in the pie stall at Fir Park did just as well as the women on the field, as Scotland won 7-0, in providing a pie that fully deserves the rating of lovely lady gravy.

Did you know you can Subscribe to Pie? Simply click on the ‘Follow’ link on the right and you will get an email advising of the glorious news that a new pie blog is ready for your consumption and while your at it why not have a look at ‘Leading The Line’ a blog not based solely on Pies, crazy I know! The link is on the left hand side and with all things going to plan will have a new article up tomorrow.

Finally and most importantly this week are a couple of links below that if you have a few minutes to spare I would love you to have a look at them and maybe make a wee donation:

Bobby Moore Fund: bobbymoorefund.cancerresearchuk.org

The Grambler: thegrambler.com

Just Giving ‘The Grambler’s ‘Kick Cancer’s Arse’ Fund: http://www.justgiving.com/Geraldine-Smith3

That’s it for the latest edition of Meat Filled Pastries, so until next time, Go Forth and Eat Pie!

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Pie 21: The Maryhill Pie

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A pie worthy of a cup final
A pie worthy of a cup final.

 

Hi again! Did you think I’d forgot about these meat flavoured beauties? If you did, you’re probably of the macaroni pie quaffing variety and have no place here. I kid, obviously, as all pie’s are welcome here but let me rationalise why this pie blog has been a few extra days in the making. You see footballing pies have passed my lips on more than one occasion in the last week or so but a combination of work and a familiar looking fixture list meant that none of these pies have been new to the world of Meat Filled Pastries, finally on Sunday this changed.

So with the kind of abandon that will be outlawed at Qatar 2022 I headed to Glasgow’s west end for a new pie adventure. Lets Rate Some Pie!

Where: Lochburn Park (Home of Maryhill FC) Clydebank v Pollok, Euroscot Sectional League Cup Final

Price: £1.10, exactly half the price of the previously reviewed Hampden and Rangers Scotch Pies.

Presentation: Presented within a white napkin of sufficient size that a badger could snuggly hibernate in as the winter months draw closer without it’s wee toe sticking out the bottom. This thing was huge and for that I am always grateful.

Meatiness: A scotch pie rammed with muttony goodness from first bite to last in which the meat was incredibly well seasoned.  The mince was coarse and importantly still had enough texture to give it a satisfying bite. I think the highest praise I can give this pie is the following antidote. So, after consuming said pie I needed to visit the little boys room (also known as a well drained concrete wall behind the main stand), after doing the required business I started heading back to where I was standing when I suddenly noticed that the peppery after taste was still very clearly present within my mouth.  With that lingering taste this pie had now marked itself out as a top contender.

Pastry: The pastry was golden and cooked just to perfection, with a bite that required your teeth to break through but enough give that none of the mince inside was at risk of ending splatted on the concrete. The bake on the pastry was consistent and such was my satisfaction at my first one, I quickly purchased a second which again reached these same high standards of crispy perfection combining wonderfully again with the aforementioned meaty goodness.

Overall: This was a cracking pie, great texture and meaty flavour that managed to linger long after the last bite had been devoured. A pastry shell that managed to be both soft and crispy whilst the brown sauce provided was none other than HP, a cherry meatball on top of this pie flavoured cake.

Gravy Factor: The kind of gravy that you would make too much of deliberately so that after your dinner you could pour the remainder onto your plate and happily sook it all up with half a loaf of bread.

Pie 17: The Hampden Pie

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The Patriotic Pie
The Patriotic Pie

This week Meat Filled Pastries laughs in the face of the international break and all the problems it apparently causes football fans across the country by not just bringing you 1, but 2 Pie’s. That’s right I risked high cholesterol and possible meat induced coma’s for all you lovely, lovely pie munchers. (Editing Note: That last line was not a joke about lesbians).

I have split them into 2 reviews so that they both get the proper time and attention they deserve.

So without further ado, and with just a touch of man flu, mainly in part to the multiple drenching’s that I, like many others, experienced to and from Hampden on Friday night, Lets Rate Some Pie!

Where: Hampden Park, Scotland v Belgium, World Cup Qualifying Group A

Price: A Hampden Scotch Pie comes in at £2.20, I have touched on my feelings on the price of my pie at the upper echelons of the game so it’s safe to say I wasn’t overly enamoured at paying this, however when put in comparison to the recently reviewed Rangers Pie then this seems to be par for the course.

Presentation: Standard silver tinfoil and tiny napkin presentation here, and I mean a tiny napkin. It’s worth adding at this point that the pie was absolutely roasting making the napkin size even more impotent and which also in part explains the slightly misshapen ‘one bite expose’ taken above, I nearly dropped the thing twice!

Meatiness: A Scotch Pie. It was a nice meaty pie, but as you may or may not have noticed there is one thing missing for it to allow me to assess a full flavour profile. You Ready for this? Now bear in mind this was for a pie consumed at the home of our national football team, team of our national sport.

You Ready?

Here it goes, they had NO BROWN SAUCE! What the hell man?!? Seriously.

It’s bad enough that I was soaked and my team were getting pumped but to no be able to sauce my pie is just a travesty too far, especially when you right a blog about these pastry delights! And no, before you say it, tomato sauce is not just as good. It is an abomination to put such stuff on your pie, it doesn’t enhance the flavour as brown sauce can so often do. It totally changes it and anybody who uses tomato ketchup instead of eating their pie bareback needs to have a long hard look at themselves.

Anyway back to the pie, the meat was flavoursome without blowing me away, I have a feeling this may be a common occurrence when sampling pie’s higher up the footballing ladder but I didn’t feel my filling was terrible in anyway. Just a bit uninspiring.

Pastry: The top came a little loose under pressure but was overall cooked to the necessary level to retain its crispness whilst also allowing an easy bite. My one complaint would be the over exuberant sprinkling of flour that topped the pie, leaving in some bites a slightly chalky after taste.

Overall: Look, it’s not going to give you that, ‘Oh I must have it again feeling.’ but for something that is produced for the mass market it’s perfectly serviceable. Although it will take me a long time to forgive them for the no brown sauce fiasco.

Gravy Factor: Just below Bog Standard Bisto, and it’s standing just below is purely down to the lack of brown sauce provided. Once again for £2.20 you want a scotch pie that is more than nicely cooked mutton in a crust.

Pie 16: The Petershill Pie

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Hangover Pie.
Controversy, at Meat Filled Pastries HQ?

There is something that you should know before I continue this review:

I had drank a LOT of Tequila the previous evening.

Tequila is generally NOT conducive to wanting to feast on Meat Filled Pastries, however with that being said after a can of that well known Scottish elixir of life Irn Bru, I gathered myself and tucked right in. So without further ado, lets Rate Some Pie!

Where: Petershill Park, Petershill v Pollok, West Superleague Premier Division

Price: Now, got to be honest here. I was rather hungover folks and as such neglected to take a note of the individual price of my Meat Filled Pastry. However through the powers of deduction I can ascertain that as it was £4.80 for 2 Pies and 2 cans of juice, that the pie was at his cheapest £1.40 based on the fact a can of juice will be no more than £1 and to be honest those cans are usually less. Either way that is a pricey Junior pie. (UPDATE: Petershill have contacted me via Twitter and have kindly provided the price of the pie as £1.50.)

Presentation: The pie was presented in a half paper, half plastic bag, an unusual presentation technique for a pie and one that was not a success in this instance. For a start the paper was not enough to contain the pie’s heat, providing insufficient protection from the warmth that a napkin would, luckily they were on hand although were rather on the small side. Then we have the plastic, oh deary, deary me, the plastic. Helping to create what can only be described as a ‘sweaty’ pie, with a thin layer of grease wrapped all the way around the outside making the need for a napkin of greater substance even more paramount.

Meatiness: A Scotch Pie things were disappointing here as well. Somewhere there is a pie maker, in his hairnet and white coat, furiously grinding salt and pepper into an empty pie case because mine certainly was lacking the seasoning a good pie requires. Not even the saviour of many a poor pastry, Brown Sauce, could provide the flavour kick my heart desired.

Pastry: The pastry was ample, too ample for the meat that was provided. It was well browned but due to the way the pie was kept warm in the plastic and paper it took on the taste and crunch of something deep fried as opposed to lovingly baked in the oven. It like most of the rest of the pie left an unsatisfying layer of grease on your lips after every bite.

Overall: Look I want all pie’s to be meat filled delights, but I have to be honest and this is the first pie on my journey that didn’t hit the mark. It was never given a chance the moment it was left to steep under a heating lamp wrapped in plastic, whilst the filling was lacking in that meaty punch in the chops that every football fan is looking for.

Gravy Factor: Anaemic gravy, somebody used one scoop of the best Bisto they could get their hands on when 3 or 4 were required.

Did you know you can Subscribe to Pie? Simply click on the ‘Follow’ link on the right and you will get an email advising of the glorious news that a new pie blog is ready for your consumption and while your at why not have a look at ‘Leading The Line’ a blog not based solely on Pies, crazy I know! The link is on the left hand side.

Pie 15: The Rangers Pie

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A first bite into a SPFL Pie
First strange look for taking a picture of my pie…Done!

The Pie Rush continues.

One of the joys of the early season is that the fixtures come thick and fast and as such so do the meat filled pastries. Now for those amongst you asking where Pie 14 has gone, it was the second pie consumed at my last footballing adventure but doing a review on the same type of pie is not the game here. If I start getting really adventurous some kind of ‘Pie Totalizer’ may materialise but for now number the pie’s I review is the best way to keep count.

This is ‘Meat FIlled Pastries’ first venture into the SPFL so without further ado, lets rate some pie!

Where: Ibrox Stadium, Rangers v Berwick Rangers, Ramsdens Cup 2nd Round

Price: A stand alone price of £2.20, I’d missed my dinner so got mine as part of a Meal Deal with a drink and a bar of chocolate (Double Decker) for a whopping £5.50! The price you play for a ‘higher’ standard of play, plastic seats and the inability to move about I suppose.

Presentation: Encased in a silver tinfoil case with a small plain napkin. Not really a lot to say here to be honest.

Meatiness: A nice meaty scotch pie, with that all important hit of pepper, making the most of the mutton inside. As can be seen in the picture there seemed to be a cavity in the middle where more meaty goodness should have been hiding for my delight. No gravy but the pie was suitably moist.

Pastry: The edges were slightly on the teeth-breaking side in some places, although as can be seen I still managed to get a good bite out of it at the second attempt. The base held up well and avoided the dreaded undercooking, turning your tinfoil case into a soup bowl and leaving you cursing the size of your napkin.

Overall: The first brand attributed Pie, as the menu board helpfully advised the supplier as McGhee’s. A nice pie, but for £2.20 you would want better than nice. It is worth noting that HP was the Brown Sauce provided here and that in itself is a rare treat.

Gravy Factor: To give it any more than a Bog Standard Bisto rating when it costs £2.20, for something that is not out of the ordinary, would be doing other pies on this journey a massive disservice.

 

Did you know you can Subscribe to Pie? Simply click on the ‘Follow’ link on the right and you will get an email advising of the glorious news that a new pie blog is ready for your consumption.

Pie 13: The Pollok Pie

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MonTheLokNow!
MonTheLokNow!

 

Today is a very special day for followers of Meat Filled Pastries, as today you see the addition of the home favourite, the pie that is a direct result of 50% of my ‘scotch’ intake, The Pollok Pie. Now I will try my best to be objective here but you have to understand this pie has been passing my lips for over 20 years, there was a change in supplier about 5 years ago but honestly that only enhanced the experience. This is really the Pie that all other Pie’s will be judged against. The ‘Control’ Pie if you will.

With that all being said lets Rate Some Pie!

Where: Newlandsfield Park, Pollok v Auchinleck Talbot, West Superleague Premier Division

Price: £1.30, at the top end of prices within Junior Football for a pie, a 10p increase on the previous year.

Presentation: Your pie comes lovingly wrapped in a small white napkin, although it could do with being a bit bigger as an occasional stray spill tends to end up on the terrace as opposed to saved in the warm embrace of the napkin.

Meatiness: The pie is well filled although there is no gravy, relying solely on the juices of the meat inside to provide moisture, which it does sufficiently, There is a good amount of pepper within, not to provide heat but to knock it up a notch from being your average pie. The meat is well packed forming a small meaty block inside but once bitten it does fall apart without much fuss.

Pastry: Was fired well enough at the bottom so there was no danger of mince falling out the arse of the pie and the edges crispy enough to pick off but not so crispy that you couldn’t bite straight through. My only niggle is the top of the pie casing which was a little loose causing some ‘sauce on nose’ hilarity as you bite down.

Overall: The Control Pie, and a mighty fine one at that, not perfect but even through these rose tinted glasses a worthy effort.

Gravy Factor: The kind of pie Aunt Bessie would have after playing with her lady garden. Satisfying Gravy.

 

Pie 11: The Rob Roy Pie

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The wasps seemed keen.
The wasps seemed keen.

I should stress as we start on this Journey of Pie, I am not going to give you lots of instagrammed images of pies, pastry touched up with yellow food colouring or the cheery face of the person who has presented it to me. No, instead it will be a one bite expose of the pie in all its meaty glory.

In most cases the pie will have ‘broon’ sauce on it, as far as I am concerned this is how a pie should be.

With that out the way lets rate some pie!

Where: Adamslie Park, Home of Kirkintilloch Rob Roy JFC.

Price: £1. Bargain for a pie in today’s climate, especially considering the sprint from work to the game involved missing my dinner. Sad Times.

Presentation: Presented in a piece of kitchen paper your Granny would be proud of, no frills but plenty of flowery designs.

Meatiness: A Scotch Pie. It tasted of meat, which is a good start, there was however a lot of space to cram some more muttony goodness into and it was a tad on the dry side, ( It should be noted that this is where ‘broon’ sauce comes into its own.)

Pastry: The top edges were crispy without being teeth breaking, although the bake on the bottom was a little firm resulting in some minor spillage when biting all the way through.

Overall: A solid effort from The Rabs, nothing spectacular, but tasty enough.

Gravy Factor: Bog Standard Bisto