As promised the pie reviews are coming thick and fast with the first of two from the East in the form of this Scotch Pie review from Fauldhouse United. After Pollok’s game on Saturday was postponed due to some rather grim events in the Rutherglen area the preceeding evening a quick browse of the fixture list was required. With East Region junior football in just the teeny tiniest bit of turmoil I thought I’d take the opportunity to take in a fixture between two of the teams who have not made a move to leave the current junior set up.
Over the past few weeks there has been a lot of hyperbole around the phrase “there’s nothing quite like the juniors.” Events like the ones I encountered at Park View play in to that way of thinking.
The passing of a figure close to the club had brought his friends and family together under the main enclosure at Park View for a swig of Buckfast in his memory. The match itself was pre-faced by a minute’s silence and then a minutes applause. An act carried because “that’s how he wanted it, something a bit different.” Yes, it would be foolish to argue that Joe Punter at Ibrox, Pittodrie or Tynecastle would struggle to have arranged such a send off but to suggest that the same could not be achieved at Coldstream, Huntly or Dalbeattie seems just a little naive.
It’s a fascinating topic given the near radio silence by some of the biggest figures in the junior game, but I don’t want to get bogged down in the pros and cons of the Great Eastern Escape just now, that’s for another time, and another forum. No, for now, let’s focus on the positives and raise a glass to Fauldhouse and all the other clubs across the country, no matter what league they play in, who take their time to acknowledge their fans of the past, present and, judging by the children I saw running around in their tops at Park View, their future too.
So with that said, and without much further ado, let’s rate some pie!
Where: Park View, Fauldhouse United 0-4 Tayport, East Premier League
Price: £1.20, pretty much the pricing sweet spot for a junior pie.
Presentation: This pie came with a veritable blanket’s worth of paper towel. If you were so inclined you could turn your pie into a tiny trampolinist tossing your pastry gaily in the air performing all manner of twists, somersaults and flips.
Meatiness: I’ve always believed that honesty is the best policy when doing these reviews and if I’m being honest this pie was a little underwhelming. The filling seemed a little bit tight in its volume and although there was a pepper kick the linger for me was a little too brief. The texture was OK but it’s not one that has lived long in the memory. All in all, it was just kind of there.
Pastry: The pastry had a flat top to it without the presence of a hole and the positioning on the pastry was a bit higgledy piggledy. The pastry was sturdy with a slight bread like taste to it. Did it secure hold the filling within? Yes. Did it have a nice golden tinge to it? Yes. Did it blow me away? Not really.
Brown Sauce: HP. Name brand brown sauce always squeaks out an extra brownie point or two.
Overall: My expectation is that the pies at Park View are provided by one of their main sponsors Bells. My suspicion is that these are the same pies that go to supermarkets throughout the country. If financially this makes sense for the sustainable running of the club then I can get on board with it. However as a guy who has tried pies across the country, produced by places both big and small, this pie was a little short of the mark.
Gravy Factor: Meh.
Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. He has contributed to prominent football sites including Pie & Bovril, The Terrace Podcast, The Football Pink and The FBA’s as well as featuring in The Scotsman, STV and a number of other media outlets. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ and part time Madrileno with a passion for food that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.
Hello pie fans. You hardy bunch of pastry connoisseurs and all around good eggs welcome to another rip-roaring edition of Meat Filled Pastries as we start to wind down towards the season end. You know what’s mental? It’s April and fixtures in the Junior calendar are still being wiped out by wind, rain, snow and abandoned tractors! You heard me right, if rumours are to believed along with the waterlogged pitch a tractor had found itself stranded on Hurlford United’s Blair Park pitch. I’ve yet to see any factual evidence to support this rationale for calling off a game a full day in advance but as a reasons go it’s pretty spectacular.
With that call off though I found myself with an unexpected fixture headache. Luckily at this time of year an important game is never too far away although the fact that I ended up in Perth an hour and a half away from where my journey started would suggest something to the contrary. Yes it was a crucial promotion clash in the battle to reach the East Region Supoerleague but the true siren song for this match was the two participants.
Jeanfield Swifts and Dundonald Bluebell.
I mean doesn’t it just sound like the kind of game that Thomas, Annie & Clarabell would chug by whilst wandering about the branch line on the Island of Sodor? The guard waving his flag from his brake van as a penalty goes skywards, the ball landing on Thomas’ funnel resting for only a second before he wheeshes it away in a puff of smoke and steam. The ball rolling into the opposing net as Tommy disappears into the distance giving it the maximum Alan Shearer finger point salute as he goes peep-peep-peep! No?..Just me?..I haven’t taken this too far have I?..
Oh, I have?..ehm OK, you’re probably right so without much further ado, and with that image of a chugging Thomas the Tank Engine in your head (don’t lie, you all went there), let’s rate some pie!
Where: Riverside Park, Jeanfield Swifts 2-2 Dundonald Bluebell, East of Scotland Premier League
Price: In an unexpected turn of events you couldn’t purchase a scotch pie. Instead you were left with the option of a mince round (that was huge) or a Steak and Gravy Pie (also very substantial). In the end I went fancy and plumped for steak parting with £1.80 for it’s meaty pleasure.
Presentation: Unusually no silver foil container instead just a medium-sized white napkin big enough to protect the hand from scalding.
Meatiness: A generous cascade of meat and gravy came washing down my gullet as I took my first bite into this toasty treat. There was buckets of tender steak here cut up in to mouth friendly bite size pieces. The meat wrapped in a gravy of a consistency that allowed it to ooze just a little without gushing all over your chin. It was absolutely boiling but it was also very tasty, the heat meaning I could savour every morsel over what felt like hours.
Pastry: Crisp and golden multi-layered puff pastry top. Just the right amount to stay crisp on top but have some soggy gravy tinged layers underneath. The sides were a little broken and perhaps slightly thicker than I was used to but in all honesty had zero detriment to the overall piey flavour.
Brown Sauce: Do we put brown sauce on luxury pies down at MFP HQ. No we do not. Moving on.
Overall: Generously sized with tender meat, unctuous gravy and a well layered puff pastry, the only slight flaw being a crack in one of the pastry walls. Overall though, delightful.
Gravy Factor: A tasty everlasting gobstopper of a pie. (Seriously I’m surprised I’m not still eating it!).
Once again I go into the unknown as with a stacked fixture card and familiar foes on the pierizon my next pie based report may be a while, but fear not as there will be one and lo, it will be good.
Until next time, go forth and eat pie!
Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. He has contributed to prominent football sites including Pie & Bovril, The Terrace Podcast, The Football Pink and The FBA’s as well as featuring in The Scotsman, STV and a number of other media outlets. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ with a passion for food that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.