Professional Pies

Pie 164: The Carlisle United Steak & Ale Pie

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I’ve gone rogue! That’s right I’ve infringed on rival turf and this last Good Friday I took a train down to Brunton Park to take in Carlisle United v Lincoln City in the race to escape League Two.

I have to say as footballing day trips from Glasgow go the hour long train ride from Glasgow Central to the populous heart of Cumbria is a pretty good one. The journey is relatively cheap, there are a good number of pubs in and around the city centre as well around the ground with Brunton Park itself a short twenty minute walk from the station. I’d recommend it and as I found on the train back to Glasgow later that evening I wasn’t the only visitor from north of the border to the Cumbrian’s that day.

The rugby club beside the stadium was busier than usual with over 2,000 Lincoln City fans in attendance hoping that The Imps would lift the title and so, after deciding to not wait in a massive queue for the second time, I headed into the stadium where I continued my supping as well as, of course, having a meat filled pastry.

So without much further ado, let’s rate some pie!

Where: Brunton Park, Carlisle United 1-0 Lincoln City, English League Two

Price: There were two pricing options for this pastry. Option 1 was to buy the pie on it’s own for £2.80 or Option 2, to buy a pie and a pint (I’m not going to get deep into the booze at football debate here) for £6. Obviously I like the economics behind option number two and so promptly set myself up with a Steak & Ale Pie and a pint of Strongbow because it was sunny and sunny equals cider. The BBC Price of Football survey recently calls this out as one of the cheapest pies in the English Football League which, considering this game was in the bottom tier of this set up, is quite frightening.

Presentation: This was weird as after putting away my change I was presented with one of those white silver lined heat retaining bags which I was assured had my pie within. After finding a spot to watch the end of the Sheffield United v Nottingham Forest game, I opened the bag to then find my pie wrapped in plastic. I remove the plastic to finally have in my hand a fairly large pie housed with a silver tin foil case. So odd.

Meatiness: Well once I got to a bite with some filling in, my first couple of bites heartbreakingly shy of both meat and/or gravy, this was a fairly tasty mouthful. The gravy was viscous and plentiful enough with the right hint of ale to the overall taste but for me the steak was a little sparse and the chunks a little small which meant they didn’t add that meaty tooth feel that really pushes a pie onto greatness.

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Pastry: It and nice golden tinge to it but it was too soft. Soft, almost spongy, on the bottom and soft on the top with the flakes of pastry a little soggy. As soon as you got through your initial bite every one that followed there after resulted in the gravy squirting out all over the shop. Pastry on a pie, on the top at the very least, should be crispy. With it being hosted in this multitude of bags the pie had clearly steamed under the heat lamps and so the pastry for me was all wrong.

Brown Sauce: None for a luxury pie. Them be the rules.

Overall: The filling tasted pretty good but the wasteful nature of the packaging and the softness of the pastry really holds this pie back. I was surprised to learn as I entered the Pioneer Stand that this was an “Award Winning” pie and my concern is that once again a pie that wins prizes on the shelf of a butcher’s or baker’s shop had been compromised in the face of mass catering.

Gravy Factor: Spongy Gravy.

Would love to have this pie without the heat bags and plastics but this site designated to the best pies you can have at the ground and as long as the pie continues to be presented in this way it will remain a fairly tasty but slightly wrong take on the wonder that is a meat filled pastry.

Next up, I have a first for the site as I get elbow deep into a Breakfast Pie from Scottish Junior side Clydebank as they took on Pollok at their temporary home of Lochburn Park in Glasgow’s West End.

However until then, go forth, and eat pie!

Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. A member of the SWPL Media Team and a contributor to various football websites and publications he also currently acts as Heart & Hand Podcast’s resident Iberian football expert, hosting “The Isco Inferno” a weekly take on all things Spanish football. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ and part-time Madrileno with a passion for food and football that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.

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Pie 160: The St. Mirren Curry Pie

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Hello pie fans, it’s been a while since a review has dropped from the desk at Meat Filled Pastries Mansion so I think it’s only fair I share an update in relation to what’s been going on and reassure you that the end has never been further away for your favourite Scottish football pie website.

Firstly, the fixture gods have not been my friend. Whilst I try and watch as much football as I can I still have a team I follow every Saturday. Pollok’s recent stability in the league combined with some over familiar cup pairings means that I haven’t been furnished with many opportunities to review new pastries.

Secondly, I have revived Leading the Line and have been focusing more on features in particular relating to Scottish and Spanish football including statistical analysis, opinion and retrospective pieces. The statistics in particular is an attempt to marry my day job to my passions and I’m quite pleased with how some of these pieces have progressed.

Thirdly, and for me this is the most exciting, I have joined the SWPL Media Team. I have been a long time advocate of women’s football in Scotland and after finally getting annoyed enough to start promoting it myself I was approached by the league to join the team. As well as covering match days for the SWPL website I have also provided statistical match previews and I am brimming with ideas about how to help the game grow at a time when the interest levels have never been higher fuelled by the national team’s upcoming appearance at the Women’s World Cup which, of course, I’m heading to.

So yeah, lots going on, and I’m willing to admit that the pies may have probably taken a back seat whilst I’ve been getting other things on the go but it’s good to be back with this curry offering from the stands of The Simple Digital Arena. So without much further ado, let’s rate some pie!

Where: The Simple Digital Arena, Scotland U17 0-2 Portugal U17, Euro Qualifier Elite Round

Price: At £2.70 this is at the top end of the football pricing spectrum in Scotland. Whilst in the junior ranks this kind of price point would be baulked at in a Scottish Premiership context there are some far worse out there as well as some better priced offerings too.

Presentation: In a large, round and shiny tinfoil case that was a lot shallower than you initially thought it was going to be. The encased pastry sitting securely on a single large white napkin.

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Meatiness: This pie was criminally under filled with so much space between filling end and pastry top that you could almost squeeze another pie in there! Putting aside the fact I burnt my tongue (my mouth filled with a plume of roasting hot steam on first bite) this pie was…alright. Initially your mouth welcomed what was a fairly generic curry taste but as you ate notes of sweetness and heat did pop their heads in from time to time. There was nowhere near enough chicken in it but as it wasn’t billed as a Chicken Curry Pie I suppose I have to let them off that one on a technicality.

Pastry: The pastry was a bit peely-wally and as the picture shows the lid flapped off the base as you ate which meant some juggling was required. It was however just crisp enough, very neat on presentation before that first bite and there was no sticking to the tin foil. Serviceable.

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Overall: I’ve yet to have a curry pie that has blown me away in a football setting, this was perfectly edible but the lack of filling really holds it back.

Gravy Factor: A half cup of gravy.

Ah, that felt good, a new pie review done. The nights are getting lighter so I’m hoping to get out and about a bit more for some midweek action over the coming months. I also am currently acting on an idea I’ve been sitting on in relation to pies so keep your eyes peeled for that when it finally drops.

However until next time, go forth and eat pie!

Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. A member of the SWPL Media Team and a contributor to various football websites and publications he also currently acts as Heart & Hand Podcast’s resident Iberian football expert, hosting “The Isco Inferno” a weekly take on all things Spanish football. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ and part-time Madrileno with a passion for food and football that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.

 

Pie 156: The East Stirlingshire Steak Pie

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Hello and welcome to the first pie review of the new year. 2019 will see me continue to try to find the best match day pastries around. One of the questions I often get asked is who makes the best football pies. I’ve often shied away from it as I’m not sure what the right answer has been, but with a new year comes new ideas and for the very first time I present to you the 2018 Meat Filled Pastries Awards.

I’ve split this into 3 categories – Best Scotch Pie, Best Luxury Pie, Best Non-Pie Pastry. I should note that at this point that this is for only new pies consumed in 2018, to include pies tasted more than a year ago just doesn’t feel right. So here we go:

Best Scotch Pie 2018 – Pie 131: The Bathgate Thistle Pie

A former World Scotch Pie Champion this offering had all the key components a good scotch pie should have all just fine tuned and turned up a little. Honourable mention to Pie 153: The Partick Thistle Pie for keeping the senior flag flying.

Best Luxury Pie 2018 – Pie 151: The Cumnock Steak & Haggis Pie

A surprise winner here. Not because the combination of steak and haggis shouldn’t have been delicious, it definitely can be, and it was but because I turned up at Townhead Park with zero expectation of having a new pie to review. To be then greeted with this beauty was truly something wonderful. Honourable mention also goes to Pie 142: The Troon Steak Pie, a pie that could feed a million people quite easily such was its generosity in size and flavour.

Best Non-Pie Pastry 2018 – Pie 130: The Girvan Sausage Roll

This was a tough one to call as it easily could have also gone to Pie 153: The Ardrossan Winton Rovers Bridie but this sausage roll just edges it with its size and neatness in construction tipping the balance in its favour. The smear of mustard inside the pastry an inspired addition.

A strong showing for the Scottish Juniors here. I had a slight concern that I was viewing these with a non-league bias but when I read back through the reviews the words really did speak for themselves. I’m writing this on the 1st January 2019 and so I thought it would be remiss of me not to welcome in the new year with a new steak pie review, this time from the Lowland League as I spent the Friday night between Christmas and New Year at the Falkirk Stadium as East Stirlingshire took on University of Stirling.

So without much further ado, let’s rate some pie!

Where: The Falkirk Stadium, East Stirlingshire 2-2 University of Stirling, Lowland League

 

Price: At £2.40 it feels like this pastry pricing was a victim of its surroundings being as it was right at the very top end of the non-league pastry pricing structure whilst also being higher than many SPFL pastries.

Presentation: Presented in a tin foil case which sat on top of a super large double layered white napkin which helped to protect your hand from the oven fresh pie.

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Meatiness: There was a fairly decent filling held within this pastry. The gravy was well-flavoured and had a nice consistency to it that when you took a bite it popped up through the hole in the pastry. A little dark brown chimney of savouriness to help you power through a cold December evening. There perhaps could have been a bit more meat distributed throughout, and perhaps what was there could have been distributed a little more evenly but it was tasty enough nevertheless.

Pastry: One of the things I often reference when reviewing a pie that has been presented inside a tin foil case is that it’s often a challenge to both keep the pastry in tact and also ensure it is properly baked. One of the method’s of stopping this sticky situation is to line the bottom of the tin with a floury layer. This was what was applied here and whilst it meant the pastry didn’t stick the layer was a little too thick giving a slight raw flour taste to the bite and although it didn’t stick it was perhaps a little soft too although it did stay entirely intact which has to be commended.

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Brown Sauce: It’s a new year but the same rules apply. A luxury pie should provide you all the saucey substances you ever need.

Overall: A decent effort. Everything tasted fine but I would have liked to have seen a little more meat in the filling and a little more bake on the base.

Gravy Factor: Decent gravy.

This is the first of two reviews from East Stirlingshire, with review two focusing a bit more on the match day experience at the Falkirk Stadium as well as on another meat filled marvel.

However until then, go forth into 2019 and eat some pie!

Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. A contributor to various football websites and publications he also currently acts as Heart & Hand Podcast’s resident Iberian football expert and hosts “The Isco Inferno” a weekly take on all things Spanish football. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ and part-time Madrileno with a passion for food and football that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pie 154: The St. Mirren Steak & Gravy Pie

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Hello and welcome to another edition of Meat Filled Pastries. As I have often explained before I started Meat Filled Pastries as a result of a bet and a desire to not let any kind of flair for the written word leave me forever. I think I’ve made peace that this isn’t destined to be my “big idea” as I continue to try and plot an escape route from my life as Office Monkey #324 but that doesn’t mean I’ve stopped searching for it. Don’t get me wrong if it wasn’t for being an office monkey then some of the things I have seen and done over the last couple of years wouldn’t have been possible (or more pertinently financed) but that doesn’t mean that I don’t want more from my life, to not still be sitting in that same desk doing the same thing in another five years time. I want to make a difference, leave a mark and not being lying on my death bed hopefully many, many years from now not wondering, what if? I’m just not entirely sure how.

My latest attempt at existential salvation comes in the form of The Scrancast. A new podcast looking at the best food and drinks creators in Glasgow, not necessarily focusing on the things they produce but the stories behind them and their journey’s until this point. Episode 1: Welcome to The Scrancast is now out on Soundcloud and you can follow it’s journey here. It’s currently pending iTunes approval and there’s a website in the works along with a whole host of other ideas relating to it so why not give it a follow from the links menu on the left hand side, there will almost certainly be some pie based content in there at one point in the future.

Speaking of the links menu, I’ve also added in a couple of new links to people I want to give a bit of a bump too. Firstly to Roddy Cons and his site “The Team on Tour” who I’m currently living vicariously through as he makes his way around the lower leagues of Spanish football, particularly in Madrid, something that I only ever really scratched the surface of. Secondly a shout out to Steven at Football Stadium Prints who has this week given up his job to pursue a career in stadium based artistry, he deserves all the support in the world for following a dream so why not take a look at that too. It’s good gear.

You know who else deserves our support? The Scotland Women’s national team as they head to their first ever Women’s World Cup Finals in France next summer. Preperations for the tournament are now in full swing, and the visit of the United States to Scotland for a glamour friendly is just another sign that the women’s game in Scotland is on the rise. So with that in mind I headed to Paisley to see how our girls would get on agaisnt the best in the world and, of course, scran a pie.

So without much further ado, let’s rate some pie.

Where: St. Mirren Park, Scotland 0-1 USA, Women’s Friendly International

Price: Having experienced some truly awful pies down Hampden way over the not distant past I was hoping that a change of venue when it came to supporting my national side would see an increase in pastry quality. Having parted with a fairly substantial £2.70 for my pastry I went to take my first bite with some trepidation, knowing that high prices and all seater stadiums have not been a common recipe for success so far.

Presentation: As is common practice with a steak based pie this was presented within a silver tin foil case although the white napkin was much larger than you would expect at a stadia of this nature.

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Meatiness: Billing itself as a steak and gravy pie meant that the pressure was on to ensure that the gravy was forthcoming. The good news was that it was, however it perhaps lacked the punch of flavour that a £2.70 pie should really possess. The meat was good though. A varied size of chunks that kept your mouth interested as you made your way through with the texture suitably tender and forgiving to the bite. Whilst it might not necessarily be a Hall of Famer in the making this was a marked improvement on some of the mass catered pies of the past.

Pastry: Not masses to say here. It was a bit bashed about and the pastry, as is nearly always almost the way when a silver casing is present, was soft on the bottom but the sides held well and there was a nice golden tinge to the top. There was a little bit of boil out but I actually quite enjoy a bit of that.

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Brown Sauce: Wee brown sachets of a cash and carry owners dreams were available but of course this was a steak and gravy pie and so to do anything other than go bareback on this luxury pastry would be to go agaisnt everything these pages have stood for over the last five plus years.

Overall: You know what? A fairly good steak and gravy pie. It was perhaps lacking a little bit of punch but at least it didn’t disintegrate in your hands as soon as you pick up like many a match day pie does at the top end of the Scottish game.

Gravy Factor: Contextually good gravy.

A decent effort from The Saints, and a decent showing from Shelly Kerr and her side against the best the women’s game has to offer. As for the next review, who knows. It’s got to that tricky time of the year where the midweek card shrinks and the weather starts to play havoc too. Have no fear though, Meat Filled Pastries will be back.

Until next time, go forth and eat pie (and why not listen to The Scrancast whilst you’re doing it too).

Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. A contributor to various football websites and publications he also currently acts as Heart & Hand Podcast’s resident Iberian football expert and hosts “The Isco Inferno” a weekly take on all things Spanish football. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ and part-time Madrileno with a passion for food and football that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.

 

 

 

Pie 152: The Partick Thistle Pie

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Back once again with the Scottish pie master,

Brown sauce dribble, meaty in the middle.

Back one again with the Scottish pie master,

Brown sauce dribble and the meat filled pastries,

and the meat filled pastries,

and the meat filled pastries,

and the meat filled pastries…

That’s right we are back once again with another pie review from Meat Filled Pastries. Much to my surprise pie 152 sees a first review from Firhill, home of Partick Thistle and for this visit, the home of the SSE Women’s Scottish Cup Final between Hibernian and Motherwell. I’ve gone on quite a bit about the need for people to support the women’s game and for those that run it to do their bit by making sure that the match day experience in as enticing as possible. It certainly feels like strides are being made in both those regards and I’ll be interested to see what the numbers are like when I see Scotland take on the USA on Tuesday 13th November at whatever they are calling New Love Street these days.

One of the biggest challenges women’s football faces in my eyes is how to address the quality gap from the very top of the domestic game (Glasgow City & Hibernian) to the rest. Whilst there was no doubting the Leith Lassies fully deserved their 8-0 win against the Women of Steel (love that nickname!) it did somewhat dampen the spectacle to see one side 3-0 up after only 15 minutes. Of course the game could have went differently but a quick look at the SWPL1 table shows that there is a gap there for the chasing pack to address.

Quality of competition not withstanding I’m really interested to see what impact the new entry criteria for next season will have on the – and I hate to use this word – product. 2019 is shaping up as a big year for women’s football in Scotland and I really hope that those in control grasp the opportunity to turn everything up a notch, not only for the fans but for all involved with their clubs too.

It’s also World Scotch Pie Championship Judging Day this week and this year’s event has had the good grace to fall on my birthday so whilst there won’t be any cake I will no doubt be pie-eyed by the end of the day.

That’s it for the pie-atribe this week so without much further ado, let’s rate some pie!

Where: Firhill Stadium, Hibernian Ladies 8-0 Motherwell Ladies, SSE Scottish Women’s Cup Final

Price: At £2.40 this is one of the more expensive scotch pies that I have had during my adventures. It will be interesting to see with the requirement for catering in the SWPL going forward the pricing strategy implemented by Scotland’s top female clubs.

Presentation: This scotch pie was presented in a tin foil case, common in the upper echelons but less so in the juniors, and with a small white napkin taken from one of those dispensers you see at large stadia.

Meatiness: This was a generously filled scotch pie. The meat reached almost every nook and cranny inside it’s pastry walls. The texture was both crumbly and firm meaning that each bite held well on initial impact before easily giving way as you made your way through. There was also a good pepper kick to this pastry, something has been feeling absent from the last few scotch pie reviews I’ve done. Not too strong to cause any harm to the overall taste experience but just warm enough to give your taste buds a little thrill on what was a pretty cold Sunday afternoon.

Pastry: The most impressive thing about this pastry was that it did not stick to the shiny base below. It was also golden on top with some lovely crispy edges accompanied by a little steam hole to give the filling some room to breath. Whilst the pastry didn’t stick it was perhaps a little soft on the bottom but it was nothing that would be of detriment to the overall eating experience.

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Brown Sauce: Small sachets of brown that helped bring the appropriate level of zing to this pastry party.

Overall: Good pastry with a generous and well seasoned filling that was complimented by a peppery kick means that this was a very good pie indeed, even if it was £2.40.

Gravy Factor: A scotch pie worthy of a cup final.

This was a top pie from Firhill. They actually had quite a wide range to choose from but for me it’s important that I always continue to give reference to the core pastry product, the one that you will find everywhere, the scotch pie. That said for those fans who do enjoy a bit of deviation you are in for a treat as next time out I review a bridie from Ardrossan Winton Rovers in the Scottish Juniors.

Until next time, go forth and eat pie!

Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. A contributor to various football websites and publications he also currently acts as Heart & Hand Podcast’s resident Iberian football expert and hosts “The Isco Inferno” a weekly take on all things Spanish football. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ and part-time Madrileno with a passion for food and football that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.

Pie 150: The BSC Glasgow Pie

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So here it is. Pie 150!

I thought about going through the key stats of this “achievement” but I’ve instead decided to let the numbers speak for themselves in the form of this snazzy little infographic.

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It’s worth pointing out that I’ve gone for the cheapest/most expensive since the start of 2018 to negate the effects of inflation etc. There has been cheaper, there has been more expensive (although none more expensive in Scotland than the pie highlighted above).

When I started this it was just a bet, a way to pass the time, but over the years it has become a useful tool not just for me, but hopefully for others too. It’s kept my writing eye in when the new ideas stopped flowing and it has led to me becoming a regular judge at not just one but two national baking and pie making competitions. I’ve got to meet and talk to new people whether it be in the game or across the industry and I’ve been able to do my bit to help raise the profile of clubs who don’t always get a shot of the limelight throughout Scottish football.

There has been times where I’ve needed a break. When I’ve been worn out by pie and being known as the “pie guy” has certainly had its pluses and minuses but all in all I enjoy this and any time somebody acknowledges it or boosts my ego with a little bit of praise it emboldens me to carry on, evolve and to continue to support those who are going about their own personal adventures where I can.

For Pie 150 I thought about being fancy, trying to go to some far-flung place to have the ultimate pie experience, but then I thought about it and realised that would be wrong. It would be against one of the core values that I attribute to this site, championing the unheralded and unglamorous in the hope that it encourages a few more fans to visit or it sticks a couple extra quid in the till when matchday hunger strikes. With that thought firmly embedded in my mind I layered up and headed to Alloa for some Friday night football action and to see BSC Glasgow take on Vale of Leithen in the Lowland League.

So without much further ado let’s rate some pie!

Where: Recreation Park (aka The Indodrill Stadium) BSC Glasgow 4-0 Vale of Leithen, Scottish Lowland League

Price: At £2 this is perhaps a little bit expensive given the level but from what I could make out this was a circumstance of the home side sharing their ground with Championship side Alloa Athletic. As a footnote it was such a tease to see the list of pies on offer when the Wasps were at home but to then know that they weren’t on offer here. The Black & Gold Pie in particular had my interest well and truly piqued.

Presentation: A fitting style for pie 150 as it was presented simply on a large plain white napkin. A bit of understated grandeur never goes a miss.

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Meatiness: This was a well filled pie although for me the texture was a little off. I think this was a result of the mixture being over worked prior to baking and perhaps the chosen bread based padding being a little too prominent in the mix. This led to a fairly solid block of meat that under the pressure of the bite also appeared to crumble quite quickly. The flavour was there though. It perhaps could have benefited from a bit more seasoning via a twist of salt and a crack of pepper but if you were blindfolded and asked to guess what you were eating you would know it as a scotch pie, something that time has shown me hasn’t always been the case.

Pastry: The pastry was interesting. It was fairly neat however did have a slight chew to it. On further review the base and sides in particular had a deep golden brown glow to them that made this pastry look fried as opposed to baked, most likely as a result of there being too much fat in the pastry dough causing a fry effect in the oven where the pie had tucked the baking tray. That said in the main it held together with only the last couple of bites requiring some nimble finger work to prevent spillage.

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Brown Sauce: Did the job that brown sauce should do. As the sauce was held in a mystery brown squeezy bottle the brand of this codiment seems destined to remain forever unknown.

Overall: It wasn’t perfect. The filling needed a boost and the pastry a little more work but overall the elements for a good scotch pie were there. With a little more love this could be very good.

Gravy Factor: It’s pie 150 and I’m feeling generous so let’s call it good gravy.

So that’s pie 150 in the books. I’m currently contemplating some re-reviews of the early pies but I’m also currently working on some other projects so will see what happens. This blog has always been about having a bit of fun and shining a light on the many wonderful football clubs across our fair land so as long as that’s still happening I’ll be happy.

One last thing before I finish. I just want to say thank you. Thank you to all of you who read, follow or ask me about my life of pie, without you this probably wouldn’t be half as much fun. I hope I can continue to keep you entertained but for now all that leaves me to say is…

Until next time, go forth and eat pie!

Peace and love.

Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. He has contributed to prominent football sites including Pie & Bovril, The Terrace Podcast and  The Football Pink as well as featuring in The Scotsman, STV and a number of other media outlets. He currently acts as Heart & Hand Podcast’s resident Iberian football expert. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ and part-time Madrileno with a passion for food and football that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.

Pie 147: The Rangers “Chicken & Chorizo” Pie

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Hello it’s not only time for another pie review but it’s also time for another pie of the month from the house that staunch built, Ibrox Stadium. When I turned up at Ibrox on Armed Forces Day I had told myself that no pies would be passing my lips as I had been well and truly burned out by not only the price but also the quality of pastries in Glasgow’s big three grounds over the years.

This came to a head at Hampden the other week. I had first reviewed the Hampden Steak Pie a long time ago now. In fact it was one of the very first pies I reviewed and it seemed to do OK under scrutiny however since then I have been subjected to a number of overpriced travesties with a particular shout out to the Queen’s Park Cheese & Onion Pie – still possibly the worst pie to ever pass my lips. My last Steak Pie at Hampden though was quite frankly taking the piss.

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At £2.90 this…this thing(!) masquerading as food has almost certainly forever left me scarred in regards to the catering efforts at the current – and now future home – of Scottish football. The pastry was welded to the case so hard that I could turn it upside down without fear of it falling out. The lid came clean off and the filling was so sparse and dry I can only assume that when this was made that is was not so much as baked but chewed up and spat out into it’s pastry shell. It was an absolute liberty, and I hope when that whatever the renovated Hampden ends up looking like that a new catering contract with somebody who actually gives a f*ck about what they’re producing is dished out.

It made me proper angry and with it’s memory still scratched across my taste buds I turned up at Ibrox knowing that it was highly unlikely that I would be purchasing a pie, and I love pies! But then it happened. I fell into their trap. A new Pie of the Month was there to be had and so with some reluctance I cleaned out my savings and purchased, what was a promising sounding, Chicken & Chorizo Pie. Did I make the right decision though?

Without much further ado let’s rate some pie.

Where: Ibrox Stadium, Rangers 5-1 St. Johnstone, Scottish Premiership

Price: It was £3.50. I’ve already ranted about the price of pies at the top table of Scottish football in this post and many times before so I think you know my feelings on this by now.

Presentation: Having had August’s pie of the month – The Rangers Bacon Mac & Cheese Pie – I was struck with how this month’s edition looked exactly the same presented as it was in a round aluminium tin and on a fairly large white napkin. Before I attempted a first bite things were actually looking pretty good.

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Meatiness: There’s no hiding it, the filling of this pie looked like spew. It was that off white colour that years of television vomits has told us a right good whitey should be. There were some small chunks of chicken accompanied by smaller studs of chorizo sitting in a very thick paste-come-sauce. To be fair it actually smelled pretty good but given its appearance as the lid of the pie came clean off when I ventured to take my first bite (more on that shortly) I found myself debating whether or not I really wanted to dive in. A feeling that I sensed was being felt by the person sitting diagonally behind me as I tried to figure out what was going on inside this pastry.

Continuing with the flavours and I would challenge anyone to add chorizo to something and not manage to draw some kind of flavour out of the final culinary masterpiece. In this instance it was the saving grace as at one point I genuinely had to check that the chunks of white in the pie were indeed chicken due to the paucity of flavour they provided. It was also a little heavy handed on the salt meaning that somehow the final result was a filling that tasted of everything and nothing all at the same time.

 

Pastry: An anaemic looking disaster. The base so raw that it not only stuck to the bottom of the tin but that it could also be rolled up into wee balls between your thumb and index finger. Once mashed in with the paste masquerading as gravy it was not good. Whilst under baked pastry is a common fault the way in which the lid of my pastry came clean off was a novelty I hadn’t yet experienced. I’m not talking a little loose either, I’m talking about the fact the two parts were never stuck together in the first place. Whilst this would go down like a lead balloon in pie judging circles I was strangely grateful as it meant I had a full disc of pastry to try and spoon the filling out with. A relief given it was impossible to lift the thing from it’s shiny shell.

Brown Sauce: I think brown sauce would’ve actually made this pie even weirder.

Overall: A marketing masterstroke for a mug pie punter like me – yes. A tasty pie – afraid not.

Gravy Factor: Sigh.

I genuinely want to know what kind of checks gets done by these large scale event caterers on the day of the match because if they check some of the riots that I’ve mentioned in this post and say that they are good then clearly I’m in the wrong business.

Anyway I have another pie review lined up for next time from Ayrshire junior side Kilwinning Rangers and their eponymous “Buffs Pie”. Until then though, go forth and eat pie!

Chris Marshall, is a BJTC accredited Radio Journalist with an honours degree in Communications & Mass Media from Glasgow Caledonian University. He has contributed to prominent football sites including Pie & Bovril, The Terrace Podcast and  The Football Pink as well as featuring in The Scotsman, STV and a number of other media outlets. He currently acts as Heart & Hand Podcast’s resident Iberian football expert. A perennial ‘Scottish Sporting Optimist’ and part-time Madrileno with a passion for food and football that has manifest itself in the wonder that is Meat Filled Pastries.