Pie 48: The Greenock Morton Pie

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If I don't say this pie is excellent Kenny Shiels will hunt me down...
If I don’t say this pie is excellent Kenny Shiels will hunt me down and then refuse to comment as to why

Hello and welcome to the first of what will be a veritable cornucopia of meat filled pastries this week, a list so long that I have resorted to my first ever Saturday evening special to prevent me falling behind. The reason for this volume of pie to be reviewed, postponements.

Now, when a fixture is postponed on a Saturday the stomachs of those unfortunate fans who are effected start to rumble, almost chanting the following phrases from deep within;

“Where’s my meat?”,

‘Where’s my pastry?”

”Where’s my pie?”,

“Where’s my gravy?”

You try to kid it on by going to the supermarket, fondling the chilled aisle and coming home to stick a pie in the oven, getting a bit of kitchen roll (never a plate) and eating it on your couch. But your body knows, it always knows, that this is not right and so you are left still unfulfilled with a sadness in your eyes, knowing that this empty feeling will not subside until the next time there’s a chill in the air and a meat filled pastry in your hand. I’m here to help you fill that void, even if it just by a little tiny bit.

As the weather continues to be more temperamental than the French national team during training at a major championships, midweek football starts to become the norm and so the opportunities to bite into even more meaty morsels present themselves. Which is good news for the site but not so good for the waistline. Now before I continue it’s important to note that this particular fixture rearrangement was not as a result of the weather but a tragic event during the match the previous Saturday, and the free entry gesture from Morton and the £6000 raised for the St. Andrews First Aid Group by fans of both sides is testament to the good that football can do.

But as I said there is a lot of meaty goodness to get through this week and so without much further ado. Let’s rate some pie!

Where: Cappielow, Greenock Morton v Queen of the South, SPFL Championship

Price: £1.50. Much like the £1.20 mark in junior football pies, £1.50 is fast becoming the anticipated price for a pie at an SPFL ground outwith the Premiership.

Presentation: A racier version of the medium-sized white napkin, this was a little thinner and a little smaller than what has fast become the standard presentation style found on Meat Filled Pastries.

Meatiness:  I know I say this a lot but the pie was thankfully meaty in both flavour and texture. I also know that a statement such as this could be deemed as redundant when reviewing a meat filled pastry however I do so to make it easy to distinguish when one doesn’t meet the tasting criteria required of such a snack because unfortunately sometimes they don’t. There was a hint of pepper but it was very faint and for my palate it would have been nice for it to have been stronger either during or after consumption. It was also a tad greasy meaning that some of that faint pepper flavour was washed away even further. It was nice but nothing that had me scrambling back to the queue for another.

Pastry: The pastry was quite short, not in texture but in height resulting in a squat little pie that snuggly secured the meat inside. But that snugness meant that when larger bites were taken the pastry caused the meat to flick up in the air that put my cat-like reactions to the test. As always I consumed this pie prior to kick off so there was no distraction from the game itself but I’d imagine it could result in you missing an important piece of on the field action if you partake in your pie during the game.

Overall: Sorry Kenny but I can’t call this pie excellent. I can call it nice and pleasant but I can’t go much further than that. It was lacking a wee bit of punch and for my taste the slight film of grease left on my lips was something I could have done without. I reckon that there will be some people who really like this pie due to its relative inoffensiveness but for me I want my pie to have a bit of bite.

Gravy Factor: Safe Gravy. The gravy that you’ve made thousands of times, one that you quite like but that gets you annoyed each time you make it because you wish you had found a way to do it better.

So another pie down but not the last we shall hear from Cappielow  as the next entry will be a long-awaited return to the luxury market with the streak and gravy offering from The ‘Ton.

Until next time, go forth and eat pie!

My latest piece for www.thefootballbloggingawards.co.uk looks at the new-found tradition of kicking the ball out of play when a player goes down ‘injured’ go have a look it’s almost as good as all the pie chat.

Did you know you can Subscribe to Pie? Simply go to www.meatfilledpastries.com and hit the ‘Follow’ link on the right and you will get an email advising of the glorious news that a new pie blog is ready for your consumption and while you are at it why not have a look at ‘Leading The Line’ a blog not based solely on Pies, crazy I know! The link is on the left hand side, and remember to visit ‘MeatFilledMerch’ for all your pie fashion needs where any personal profit made will go to The Grambler: Kick Cancer’s Backside Fund’ a truly worthwhile cause.

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